Archive for the ‘General’ Category

While Valentine’s day was not our usual “big”  event day as it was B.K. (before kids) we were really excited about actually getting to do do anything.  One of my girlfriends, Cassie, volunteered to watch the boys for the evening… all three and she already has three of her own. Her husband was going to be away on business for the week and so she thought she would volunteer to help us out.  Thank you Cassie!!!  I know some adoption experts would not recommend leaving your recently adopted child, but I know a lot of marriage experts would recommend some couple time away.  Brandon actually stayed home from work Thursday, not to celebrate VDay all day but because he lost his voice (can’t sell stuff without a voice).. so we dropped the boys off around 4…. made a stop at the liquor store (can’t buy wine at the grocery store here (one of the many twilight zoneish things about this state) and got to Red Robin right as the 5 o’clock rush of merry makers came in.  I guess in a place where most of the population are children, the parents all think like we do…. out early and home early for bedtimes.  I was surprised that Brandon actually chose RR. Usually he wants to go someplace “extra special” but he said we usually spend a lot of money when you (traci) would be just as happy with the food from a casual place.  So casual it was and really fun.  We ate a lot of really “good” for you food and had a couple of “fun” drinks and talked a lot.  I was waiting for my cell to ring but it never did.  Instead of going to a movie like we usually like to do we went over to Target and bought one. 

When we got to my friends house to pick up the boys they were in their pjs and looked content but happy to see us.  I actually think it was good for Eyob.  He learned that he would survive and that we would come back.  It was the first time both of us had been away from him at the same time.  He was really affectionate with me by his choice, which doesn’t happen very often.  Did I mention.. Thank you Cassie!!!  You’re a life saver!!!

After the kiddos were in bed we watched the movie we bought, Martian Child, which brings me to my topic.  You have to see this movie if you are in the adoption world, want to be, are thinking about it or just interested in watching a good movie.  It was clean, only PG, and was such a moving story about the miracle of adoption.  So many times throughout the movie I was thinking about Eyob and what we are going through and thinking about the vision for orphans that God gave me when I was small and while it seemed to disappear in the post adoption aftermath it is beginning to come back again.  It is movies like this that inspire me to think about doing it again.  I know, I know…… more on that later. 

By the way, John Cusack plays the lead role in this movie (we love John) and his sister Joan Cusack supports.  The little boy they picked for the part of the boy was also fabulous in his part. So not only was it an awesome movie, the acting was great also. 

At the end of the movie the main character makes a statement about all kids that I thought was really profound……. he said something like… All kids come into this world as aliens or martians and their first years are spent trying to learn about us….. The way he said it was much more insightful and made me think in a new light about Eyob and all that these last 2 months must have been like for him.  He truly has been an alien in a new land, trying to figure us out, just as we have been trying to learn about him.

Watch and enjoy. 


Read Full Post »

Nothing to say……

I think I just went through a little writing dry spell.  I started out with this blog really gung-ho.  It seemed like I was always thinking of things to write about.  Things that happened during the day, or different things I was learning or reading all seemed like good ideas to write about.  I was constantly looking at the world through the eyes of a writer and then……….it just stopped.  I have no idea why. Maybe the novelty wore off, or the days were busy or I just really didn’t have anything to say (I find that hard to believe since I like to talk).  Anyway, let’s just say I have been on a blog vacation. 

The more I think about it, the more I realize that my lack of blogging directly coorelates with my trying to get back into a routine.  It is so easy as a stay-at-home-mom to get “lazy” about routines.  You stay in your pjs a little longer then you maybe should, or you use a movie to babysit a few too many times (don’t get me wrong all those things have a useful purpose) or you run to the computer to pass the time.  I think for a while there I was looking for a way to check out.  Maybe not… Maybe I am over analyzing myself.  I am a person who craves routine and order and so I have been really trying these last two weeks to begin to create routines with the boys again.  I have been doing some “preschool stuff” with Sloan.  We have been getting outside more regularly.  I am trying really hard to keep up with some form of daily devotions.  What I am learning about all of this is that I need to have order and routine in my life in order to be flexible.  I don’t know if that makes any sense but having a schedule helps me know when I can do something with a friend on the spur of the moment or go play at the park with the boys when it wasn’t scheduled.  Otherwise, I just waste the day doing useless things and feel disappointed in myself for not getting anything done or doing anything of value.  Enough rambling……

 All this is to say, I’m back and even though I don’t get a lot of responses on the blog which does make me sad a little….. I have missed you all and missed writing. 

Read Full Post »

well, the boys got shot anyway and I just felt like I did. 

 I had to take the boys into the doctor today.  Sean needed a 1 year WCC (well child check) and shots; Sloan needed shots.  I thought I was prepared; I had cars, sharks, snacks, sippy cups, diapers..etc.  Every thing you need for a doctor’s visit.  Turns out I didn’t have the one thing I really needed: the ability to protect my children from pain.

The visit started out pretty well: we only had to wait 15 minutes (amazing at a doctors office).  They took us back in the room and the boys ate all the snacks that I brought in about 5 minutes, which scared me a little (being in a small room with a one  and a two year old for an extended period with no food and no way to get any is a dangerous thing.)  Sloan sat down on the doctors little swivel chair and started to check out everything on the counter, just like a good two year old does.  Then he settled down and began to drive his cars on the counter (see I told you, he loves cars).  Sean wandered around half naked checking things out.  Anyway, to make a long story short…. Dr. Pete came in and we chatted about the boys and the issues we had.  Discussed the fact that I think Sloan has food allergies and whether I should give the boys the chicken pox vaccine.I decided to go ahead with the shots and get blood work for Sloan to check for allergies.

THe nurse came in to give Sloan his shots first.  He knew it was coming so he was in a panic.  He laid down on the table and I held his arms down and tried to talk to him to keep him calm, but he just fell apart.  He started to sob and say, “Don’t hurt me mama.”  Talk about ripping my heart out.  It only took a few short seconds but felt like minutes.  He wouldn’t be calmed and I had to go ahead and set him down and hold Sean down while they gave him six shots.  The whole time I am holding Sean down; Sloan is crying and pushing on my telling me to get off his brother and stop hurting him.  Ahhhhhh!  I felt like  the worst mom on the planet.  It only got worse; from their I gave a crying Sean to a nurse to hold and took Sloan down to the lab to get blood work.  I held him on my lap while they tried to draw blood. He is a stong little stinker.  Wouldn’t you know they were ony able to get half the blood they need to out of that arm and we had to try again on the other.  Poor little guy was so traumatized he was shivering and asking for his blanket as he sobbed in my arms.  About this time the lack of food and the cup of coffee I had earlier mixed with adrenaline kicked in and I felt like I was going to jump out of my skin. 

Later, as we were driving to McDonald’s (my attempt to reward them) I was thinking about how I desperately want to protect my boys from pain.  It hurts me to watch them hurt and even worse it hurts me to know that I held them down while they were hurt.  The thing is I also know that sometimes my kids need to experience hurt in order to keep them safe.  Weird!  Not to make much out of an ordinary situation, but I was thinking about how the hurt that I go through in my life is sometimes what teaches me when nothing else will.  God allows the pain so that I will grow.  I know not a new concept, but it is so awesome when God reveals something to you in a new way.  So maybe getting shot or shots isn’t so bad.

Read Full Post »

Home- Part Two

My dad wrote about “home” yesterday and I thought it was so interesting because I had started a post with the same title.  I found myself not having much to say after reading his post.  However, he encouraged me to keep going with the topic.

 I started thinking about what “home” is when we sold our first house almost 2 years ago this May.  It was the first home we ever owned and we really loved it.  From there we moved into my parents house and started the never-ending process of building a house.  Before it was finished, Sean was born, in might I add, yet another house.  Finally, our new home was finished and we moved in.  Two  months later Brandon had a job offer and he was off to Utah.  We followed in October 2006.  We went from a brand new 2300 sq ft. house to a tiny 1200 sq ft apartment.  6 months later we are in a whole new town in Utah, living in our recently purchased townhouse.  All this is to say that “home” has been elusive to me the last two years.  I crave the known……. surprises aren’t my favorite.  I like the security that a house surrounded by my stuff brings.  So now when we are finally settled and most of our belongings are unpacked for the first time in 2 years, why do I still feel homeless?  Why do I feel like I am a ship floating around at see, away from the port and without an anchor?

Maybe it is because I am so use to the chaos that I am unable to settle down now. Maybe I am afraid to get to attached to a place because who knows when I will be leaving it again.  Maybe I just haven’t been here long enough to feel attached to it.  All of these things are probably true, but as I have really contemplated why I am feeling so without a home, I think it is because truly this world is not my home.  For the first time in my life I think that I am beginning to see and understand that we, as Christians, really are aliens and strangers.  This world just isn’t fitting me right anymore and instead of longing for the peace and security that having a home brings I need to be longing for Jesus.  As my dad said in his post, home is in Jesus Christ.  I think the last 2 years have loosened my grip on this world.  How like God to take me on a journey like this.  A journey, that at times felt like it was taking me so far from Him, but in truth was leading me right into His arms. 

Read Full Post »

On the West Bench, just south of Salt Lake City, there is a little community called Daybreak that we are currently calling home.  We stumbled into this community by accident or more likely by God’s divine plan, a few months ago.  Right after Christmas.  A guy at Brandon’s office was looking to get out of his townhouse quickly and while we weren’t really looking for a new place to live, we decided to check it out.  I had never been in a townhouse before and wasn’t sure I would like it, but I think God new.  After looking at the house one time, we decided to put an offer on it.  Because the guy needed to get out of it quickly we were able to get it at about 15% less than the going rate!  With next to no hassle we purchased it and moved from our little apartment out to this growing community. 

The home itself is about 1600 sq ft finished with another 900 sqft in the basement that needs to be finished at some point.  It has 9ft ceilings, 3 bedrooms, 1 1/2 baths, crown molding in all the rooms and neat paint.  All in all, we really like it and are trying to make it feel like home.  It is hard for me to feel attached to it after having moved so many times in the last few months and after working so hard to finish building a house only to leave it a few months later.  Anyway, I am thankful for this new home.

The community itself (Daybreak) is pretty neat.  It is in its third phase of building (I think..) with maybe 10 more phases to go.  There is a community center with all sorts of activities available (we can walk to it in about 3 minutes) an elementary school, numerous parks, a lake with fishing and boating (non-motorized), miles and miles of walking trails, and even a small pool.  Daybreak boasts all kinds of events that help provide a sense of community.  Anyway, I provided a link to their website and thought you could check it out if you wanted a visual of where we are.  When I figure out how to attach pictures I will show you our house and the area.  Thanks for reading.

Read Full Post »

Going Public

Well, I just sent out an email announcing my new blog……. Hopefully, you will all enjoy keeping up with us and will help us keep up with you.  I know that not everyone enjoys posting publicly so if you are one of those please email me personally in response to a post.  I try hard to write back and I always love to hear from friends and family.   Thanks again for reading! 

Read Full Post »

Mountain Picture

The picture heading this blog is one I took of South Mountain from outside our apartment.  Isn’t it amazing?!  We are surrounded by these beautiful mountains.  Come visit and check them out…… 🙂

Read Full Post »

« Newer Posts - Older Posts »